Debt And Marriage

debt and marriage
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Americans are deeper in debt now than ever before in the history of our nation. Credit card companies are prolifically marketing their “services” and they do a damn good job of it.

American citizens are using their credit cards for EVERYTHING despite the fact that they are paying 20% interest and even more in some cases. It’s literally highway robbery! I’m not saying that credit cards don’t have their place, but use caution.

Few things in life cause the kind of stress that money problems do. The truth is, bankruptcy and divorce usually go hand in hand. Facing a situation like bankruptcy is more trying on a marriage than nearly every other scenario out there.

When your credit card payments get so high that you can’t pay minimum payments and buy groceries… that’s the kind of thing that will tear couples apart.

They often tend to start blaming each other and with all the stress and tension of being in that deep financial hole, neither person is thinking with a clear, cool mind. And things get out of hand.

Debt Equals Risk

No matter what you might find in the media, debt really does equal risk. I can tell you with complete certainty that 100% of bankruptcies were caused by debt! Duh, right?

But look, many people don’t seem to make this distinction. If you want to have exactly ZERO financial risk in your life, then you need to completely eliminate debt.

No debt, no risk.

No risk, happy couple.

When Life Happens…

debtWarren Buffet was quoted saying, “You can tell who’s skinny dipping when the tide goes out.”

This is a great analogy of how most people look at debt. People often refer to it as “leverage” just to make it sound more sexy and sophisticated. But it’s not sexy OR sophisticated.

Because when life decides to throw you a curve ball and your paychecks are completely stretched thin because of all your payments, you get stuck. Then you go borrow more money to get you through the storm… which increases your monthly payments even more.

It truly is a vicious cycle and it HAS TO STOP somewhere. All you need to do is make a decision to change your money habits and develop a plan to finally pay off all debt and NEVER BORROW MONEY AGAIN!!

Different Decisions When Debt Free

You really do make different decisions when you’re debt free. When you buy everything on credit, your brain doesn’t really FEEL the purchase. It doesn’t feel the “pain” that occurs when money leaves your wallet or bank account.

Because you know you don’t have to pay for it now… so the pain is deferred. But when the pain does come, it’s exponentially worse because there’s so much more than one purchase that you’re paying for.

Often, you’re paying for things that you don’t even remember buying.

The point is, you make different decisions when you make all of your purchases with cash. But it doesn’t just affect your buying decisions. It affects your relationships, too. Especially with your spouse.

Having no debt and a nice fat savings account is one of the most peaceful feelings you can have. It allows you to be generous with what you have. You can be more present in the moment. You will feel real peace and cheerfulness and you wouldn’t believe the effect that can have on your marriage.

I’d like to share with you the TED Talk below. Adam Carroll does a really good job of explaining how physical money has a different effect on us than digital currency (especially credit).

He didn’t talk much about marriage but he does a very good job of making my point. You may also be interested in reading this post where I talked about how to do marriage well.

Do you have any thoughts on the matter of debt and marriage? Please leave your thoughts down below!


    1. Post
      Elwin Leos

      It’s true that sometimes major things come up like a car accident or someone in your family gets sick. But if you are prepared and have a big fat emergency fund stashed away (takes a while to build I know) then you will be prepared to take care of these unforeseen events with CASH…

  1. Sue Zimmerman

    What should we do if we are over 100k in debt and cannot qualify for a mortgage?

    1. Post
      Elwin Leos

      You’re not ready to buy a house!! Take care of your finances first, get things under control. It’s fine to rent for the time being but you guys need to get your spending under control and TAKE CARE OF THIS MASSIVE DEBT! Once that’s done, then you can look into buying a house. If you buy a house now, it will be a curse and not a blessing. Trust me, please!

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